My Daughter's Boyfriend is Killing Me?
If your 17-year old daughter's 19-year old boyfriend repeatedly comes into your house with no chaperone (against the rules) over and over and over again.
He comes over during the day while I'm at work and is having intercourse with his underage girlfriend... my daughter... nothing I say seems to work.
When can I treat the adult as an intruder? What are the laws in Arkansas that I can do to intruders?
I really don't like the guy.
Thanks.
Answers:
I feel your pain, I have 3 grown sons and I have SET the rules many times, and many times they were broken. I remember sitting one of my sons down and talking to him very respectful, talking like adults, it did work for awhile but then he was back to the same old thing. The minute my husband and I would leave the house he would throw a party or take one of our cars out. It got to the point that I did want to strangle him, and I came close. The turning point was when we did go out we only went down the street to a friends house and waited for about 1 hour and then drove home but parked somewhere else. I got out of the car as the kids were coming up the driveway, I scared the hell out of them and blocked them so they could not leave. I told them I would not hesitate to knock some sense into them as I am a brown belt in karate and they were trespassing on MY TURF and if I found them on my property again I would blow their knee caps off! And they know that I would do it. I kicked them off the property called the police and told them. I also grounded my son for the whole summer and also told him if it happens again he will be kicked out of the house. If kids can't live by the rules, kick them out, case closed, you don't need to put up with this. As far as your daughter is concerned, you can't stop her from having sex.you just can't, but do tell her not in YOUR HOME and yes have this guy arrested. He does not RESPECT you or your home and I would take him out so quick he wouldn't knew what hit him. It's tough out there and I feel for you, I really do. YOUR the dad, do what you need to do. Good luck to you. Contact me if you want to.
sure. i mean hey, its only murder if you get caught..
seriously though. its illegal for him to be sleeping with your daughter. make it very clear to him you have the power to put him in jail and make him a registered sex offender for the rest of his life.
Yes you can- if he's been forbidden from the property, then he's tresspassing and you are legally allowed to take whatever steps are necessary to protect your daughter from the intruder. Give him fair warning, and then open fire.
Have him arrested. He's engaging in Statutory Rape.
you can do it now, 18 is a legeal adult, lets put it this way, if i was 18 and commited a robbery, i will go to prison and be tr4ied as an adult.
you just have to respect your daughters choose . . . if its love . . .there's nothing you can do about it . . .
Call the police and have him arrested for statutory rape. It is against the law to have sex with a minor.
Review your local laws on trespassing. He's coming in uninvited by you, the homeowner, and therefore has no business. If you really want to send your point across, drag his *** into civil court for said trespassing. May be a little extreme, but these days, sometimes you just gotta go that extra mile to drive your point home.
No you can't shoot him, but you can get him in trouble for having sex with a minor. At 17 it's considered consensual sex so he won't get in as bad as trouble as you would think, but it might scare his *** to listen. Or you could just threaten him with that!
hahahaha! u sound like my dad!
he's not intruding if she invites him in.
but u can make threats that will scare the hell out of him!
Go get a restraining order. Then you start to build a case every time he violates the order. Good Luck.
You cant shoot him. You can tell him he is not welcome in your home and call the police when he comes. Depending on the law where you live there may not be much you can do about them having intercourse. As long as she is of your states legal consent you are out of luck on that.
I would call and check with my local law office to check with the rules in your county
good luck.
I agree with the others as long as she invites him in he is not an intruder. But she is still a minor in your home.
turn him into the cops...it's against the law to have sex with a minor. (if he's 19, he's of legal age...she is not.) If you have forbidden him access to your home, tell the cops he's an intruder and get him picked up for unlawful entry. (your daughter gave him permisson, but you are the owner of the house and it's YOURS.)
Tell him, once, that he is unwelcome and not to enter your property again. When he shows up, call the police. You may not shoot this piece of work, but you can use reasonable force to remove him and keep him out.
As to what to do about your daughter...well...I thank God daily that my child is a boy, and I do not know how I would handle your situation, except that I would likely send my daughter to live with relatives for the foreseeable future.
If she's underage, all you have to do is call the police. But unless you're willing to accept the possibly permanent estrangement of your daughter, you have few options. The issue is really between you and her.
You might try taking a day off of work and hang out around the corner in your car until he arrives, then let him know that if he ever comes near your daughter again you will have him imprisoned for statutory rape. But again, your daughter is going to be furious. Your call.
u can plant drugs in his car and call the cops. your daughter would probably see him in the next 5-10 years. problem solved :)
call the police
You should get a dog..like a pitbull most men feel threatend by dogs.. it will keep him away for sure especially if he wears a muzzel that says i bite real hard..ouch!
or a chastity belt? but get condoms grandma lay them around the house
just be sure that anything you do will not make your daughter hate you
Sounds to me like your daughter is the real problem.
If she didn't let him in the house, you wouldn't have to worry about who was bumping uglies.
I would ground my daughter- take away anything and everything that meant anything to her for at least 2 weeks for each infraction.
I assume you already have the neighbors watching your place and that is how you know Romeo is dropping by- make sure your daughter knows she is being watched as well.
Put up a no- trespassing sign so that when you shoot him- they can't say he wasn't aware that there guests weren't welcome.
Good luck- my daughter is 15 and I guess lucky for me she's a pretty good kid unlike myself.
sergio - Wow. Just...wow.
Desii - Errrrr! Wrong answer.
It IS illegal for him to be on your property if you told him he is unwelcome there. As someone above mentioned YOU are the homeowner and have every right to refuse entry (regardless of your daughter's wishes). You can do a few things: get a retraining order on him for your home, then have the police keep an eye out for him (they will check out your home if you ask them to); you can also call the police and charge him with rape (but you better have proof because otherwise your daughter isn't likely to testify).
Call your local district attorney. See if he is interested in charging this guy. Skip the cops until the DA gives you instructions.
Thats rape because she is underage as a parent even if she cocented you can press charges and because it is youer house without permission hes breaking the law also get a restraining order for you her and where you live break that he will get into trouble. I would tell him if I found out about him doing that again I would press charges for both things do it with youer daughter in the room if it wont work on him it might make her think about it again if that doesnt scare him clean a gun in his sight not loaded. I didnt see/hear nothing.
NOOOOOOOOOOOOO, don't shoot him, you will ruin everyone's life's, take a step back and talk to someone who has been in the same position as yourself, honestly you need to calm down and start thinking rationally, or you're going to end up losing everything including your daughter, who will probably hate you for the rest of her life, you need to back off man and talk to someone. The hardest thing in the world for any parent to do is let go of thinking their children are innocent babies, get with it, they are growing up at a rapid rate because society is spiraling out of control all around our children, you are the parent and it is your job to FIX whatever problem arises to the best of your ability, that's called responsible parenting. Get help now, if you care about your family, and don't hang your head in shame because you need help, man asking for help shows that you are like the rest of us parents, ie: confused .
Load up a roll of dimes or rock salt in the 12 gauge. It won't kill him, but I don't think he will be showing his face for a while!
Personally I prefer a roll of dimes. They flutter quite nicely!
Face up to the fact that your daughter is sexually active. Also come to grips with the fact that your influence over your daughter is waning by the minute.
The best that you can hope for if you continue to try to throw your weight around is to drive your daughter and her boyfriend to do it some place else. Is it statutory rape? Better check your state laws. In MD the age of consent is 16. Is he trespassing? Not unless you have forbidden him to enter the property.
As a dad that has gone through what you are going through, my advice is to be civil to the guy. If he is a bum, your daughter will find out soon enough. If you try to play hardball you will just drive your daughter to him and you will be the looser.
Now if the guy steels from you... have him arrested. But your daughter's virginity is gone, can't get that back...and it would have happened sooner or later...
When I was in highschool my boyfriend and I found a way. Not saying that it is ok but she will still find a way to be with him. They are only 2 years apart - Do you really think you need to have him arrested? My dad forbid me to see my bf and I lied and made it happen. Try something else. Keep her busy with something else, get her on BIRTHCONTROL (and give it to her yourself!!!) Don't push her away by making threats and putting him in jail. That will hurt your relationship with her. Can she get a job to keep her busy? My dad is so obsesive about my relationships that I still have to answer to him and I am almost 30. We don't speak any more because he told me to leave my husband for no major reason. Only little petty things that we will work out. He doesn't respect me or listen to me he only trys to control me. You don't want to loose her over this guy who will probably be out of her life soon anyways! Unless you don't give her birthcontrol!! I can't stress that enough. She is almost an adult so she probably thinks she already is. Talk to her, give her some respect, and love her and she may give you the respect you are asking for and not let him come over unsupervised.
I know you're joking about shooting him. He is trespassing, so you can have him arrested for that.
As for statutory rape, that depends what the law is in your state.
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