Domestic violence: is not the police department in the wrong?
A friend of mine suffers from domestic violence. her boyfriend is not officially married to her, but they have been together for twenty seven years. He has not paid child support, does not contribute to rent (he will not even work), and is abusive towards her and the children (when the children were younger). When she calls the police department in fear for her safety, they tell her that there is nothing she can do since her boyfriend receives mail at the home. They will not remove him from the property, or arrest him for domestic violence, unless they, "catch him in the act", in which, when it takes place, by the time the police arrive there, he is, "finished beating her". in fact, whenever she calls the police regarding anything, they rarely appear or follow through because her sons are public enemy number one in the city. regardless of that, they are neglecting to serve and protect, yes?
Answers:
The truth appears rather stretched in this story. If the police see evidence of physical abuse they will arrest the boyfriend. They can not simply remove the boyfriend just because she does not want him there.
In some states, the victim is required to press charges. If she does not follow through and press charges she is just as much at fault.
YES! In Virginia, my sister-in-law was cheating on my brother-in-law and she tried to accuse him of domestic violence because when he found out he threw his sunglasses on the ground and she claimed that he threw them at her then took a swing at her. Even though there was a witness who supported his statement, the police took him in anyway.
Your friend needs to call one of the abuse hotlines and maybe go to a safehouse for a while. If the police can't get him to leave, then she needs to take the step and leave herself.
Good luck to her and her kids.
I really must wonder where in the world this is taking place! My ex was verbally abusive, occassionally physically abusive, didn't live with me, and he ended up in jail for 2 nights for threatening to kill me.
Please put your friend in touch with the National Domestic Violence Hotline:
1-800-799-SAFE (7233)
1-800-787-3224 (TTY)
http://www.ndvh.org/
AND contact the local police department and at least inquire with their internal affairs department.
It;s time that she leave him before she really gets hurt or even killed. He is using her and the children for batting practice. The police are probably tired of hearing from her over and over. She shows no backbone if she lets this behavior continue. If the police find them fighting, they both will be arrested. This women needs help right away, even with her sons. She needs to call a crisis hotline in the area for referrals. The police are probably fed up with her and the entire family.
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